I know, it has been a while since I’ve given you a Brie’s update. I thought I posted an one in August. Apparently not. At any rate, let’s dive in.

Covid finally caught me

It took four and a half years, but Covid finally caught up to me. I’m not thrilled about this, in case you’re wondering. Not only does it make breathing difficult, it has put a very not-needed stopper into my schedule. I don’t know which is worse, the stuffed up nose, the angry lungs, or the nasty metallic aftertaste the medicine (which I’m thankful exists) leaves in your mouth! Covid is no fun, and I don’t recommend it.

What I do recommend is this: get vaccinated if you haven’t! If you have, make sure you stay up on your boosters. Please. I want to see your lovely faces sticking around for a while, because…

A new idea has formed

I’ve been thinking about creating a poetry chapbook for a while now. Trouble is, I’ve been struggling with what to put in it. Did I want it to have a theme? Did I want to focus on a specific subject or two? I wasn’t sure, and I was trying to figure it out all summer, but then…

A year has passed

For those who don’t know, my mother, Marlene Davis, died August 30, 2023. It was one of the hardest days of my life, and the decision to take her off life support was both painful and merciful. I hated that my sister and I had to do it, but I wouldn’t have made any other choice. Mom is at peace (and happily sitting on my bookshelf, since I got custody of the urn), and that is what matters.

I learned some things from that. Having the awkward and uncomfortable conversations beforehand surrounding living wills, wills, and funeral arrangements cuts down on so much uncertainty and confusion in a time of profound grief. Mom’s end-of-life preferences made our decision easier to make. In the end, the right thing to do was respect her wishes.

Having a will is crucial to making your beneficiaries’ lives easier in this process. Mom didn’t have one, but, thanks to living in an apartment, she didn’t have a large estate, so it was significantly less of a hassle. Having funeral arrangements done (and paid for) ahead of time would have made our lives easier. By needing to save money, though, we did have to not honor one wish: we ended up not interring her ashes in a cemetery plot (I’m happier about this, because I kind of like having Mom hanging out on a shelf).

More than a day

When mourning someone as close to me as Mom was, I realized, during August, that mourning this anniversary involved more than the day she died. Mom had a rough go for about two and a half months. She had three surgeries, two strokes, and a bout of pneumonia during that time. Her poor body just couldn’t keep up. And my sister, my mother’s best friend, and I spent practically every day with her when she was in the hospital. It was a painful time, and it lasted for more than one day. It’s a time period I’ve had to mourn, as well.

Reflections on death

I have done a lot of reflecting on death in the past month. Not just on Mom’s passing, but on the concept itself, particularly the anthropomorphic ideal of death. And this reflection has created quite a bit of poetry

Yes, you guessed it. I figured out what subjects I want to cover in the chapbook. And, yes, I realize how morbid that sounds, but the mind processes how the mind processes. And, apparently, mine has been doing so through poetry.

So look forward to a new chapbook from me soon. I would love to publish it on her birthday, November 14, but that might be a lofty goal. Maybe in time for her favorite holiday? That gives me another four weeks.

Here is one of the poems I wrote during this time of reflection.

Nearly a Year
It has been nearly a year
Since your new journey began
In a place I couldn’t go to –
That beautiful, distant land.

The world is a little empty
Since you went away.
And life has taken weird turns –
I wonder what you’d say.

Would you tell me I was crazy
To take such an uncertain path?
Or would you tell me how proud you are
To see me make dreams come to pass?

Sometimes a year passes quickly,
But this year has dragged on.
And I desperately miss you
Now that you are gone.

I hope you realize,
Wherever you have flown –
You were the first person I met,
And the greatest I’ve ever known.

Copyright 2024 Brigitta Shannon Rose

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That’s all for now. Stay fabulous, y’all!